Love Languages

Dr. Gary Chapman claims there are five love languages in which we all give and receive love: gifts, quality time, acts of service, words of affirmation, and physical touch.

I once did a love language inventory while at a team leader training; physical touch was my lowest. Considering this, and my fear of small children, I find it intriguing that I have enjoyed my trips to the local orphanage so much. In some ways, it seems paradoxical that you could enjoy a trip to an orphanage, but in so many ways I feel like I have gained more from my time there.

Yesterday, a coworker and I spent about two hours with several special needs children. Though in the past I’ve always shied away from people with disabilities, I have found that in my volunteering time I have most enjoyed being with those who are immobile.

One young man caught my attention. At first sight, he looks like he is four or five. His body is clearly underdeveloped, and his body rigid from a disease, lack of physical therapy, or a great many other reasons. His little fingers mirror those of a young toddler and his legs are curled up much like a cricket.

Feeling kind of uncomfortable, but wanting to be more helpful, I asked the ayi if I could hold him. She said yes, but that he was “hen da” (very big). She was right. His body, though small in size, definitely weighed more than I thought, but I managed to move him into an easier position for me to hold. It was then that I noticed he had a slight mustache forming on his upper lip. Curious, I wanted to know his age. I couldn’t remember the question words involved, so I told the ayi, “wo shi san shi yi sue” (I am 31 years old.). “Ta?” (him?). She said he was “shi san” (13).

So, why am I even writing about this experience? Simply because as I look in the faces of these kids, I have to come to grips with beliefs I have about the Father and His love for them. His son’s death seems to have even greater significance in their lives—his healing ministry and his gift of hope in greater things.

In my two hours with my “peng you” (friend), I saw him begin to move his fingers, more readily blink his eyes, and begin to mutter some sounds, and in those brief hours I realized that those who have special needs children or work on a daily basis with special needs children and adults in some way are extending the Son’s love to those society often deems unlovable; and I am thankful for their work.